COURTESY STLMADE
File this under “culinary abominations that should not exist.”
This one is for all of you real St. Lunatics out there.
On March 14, in honor of “3.14 Day,” Hi-Pointe Drive-In (multiple locations including 1033 McCausland Avenue, 314-349-2720) will be serving a burger so St. Louis that it’s truly testing our sanity.
The burger, dubbed the St. Lunatic, starts out simple enough, made with a foundation of a single cheeseburger patty. Where the burger goes off the rails, however, is the barbecued pork steak, T-ravs, Red Hot Riplets and Provel placed on top of the patty. If that collection of St. Louis foods wasn’t enough to stomach, it’s all packed between two small squares of Imo’s Pizza in place of buns.
In a press release, the special menu item is billed as “an extraordinary burger that is sure to make any St. Louisan proud.” Hi-Pointe has a long history of serving over-the-top specials, but this particular smashed together buffet of local favorites has broken our (admittedly already semi-broken) brains.
Here’s where we’ve lost the plot: If we eat the burger, does that make us real St. Louis lunatics, so die-hard in our blind love of these foods that we’re willing to smash them all together and force our digestive systems to face the consequences? Are we even eligible to continuing living in St. Louis if just the thought of this burger fills us with existential dread? Can only true St. Lunatics climb this mountain of food and live to tell the tale?
If you’re brave enough to try, grab the $12 sandwich at one of Hi-Pointe’s two area locations on Saturday, March 14 from 10 a.m. to 9 p.m. (or until the special sells out).
Follow Liz Miller on Twitter at @lizzaymillah. We are always hungry for tips and feedback. Email the author at [email protected].
